El Nino's Big Adventure

We spent Memorial Day weekend visiting family, Great Aunts and Great Uncles and even our five-week-old cousin, a sweet little girl who has brought a glow to her mother's cheeks. Our baby cousin has a big dog to watch over her (two actually, but we only met one of them). And he slept most of the time we were there. But at one point he walked past el as he played on the floor, gave him a sniff, and licked the side of his face with his long tongue. El was undeterred and continued playing. He likes dogs. I expect there will come a time when we will have to explain to him that he is not one of them. We also visited Grandpa in the nursing home, and he really seemed to enjoy el. Grandpa said he had beautiful "features". And el liked sitting with grandpop too through his wiggles and bursts of energy.

El and mom took a bus up to visit grandma, our first together. Normally, wherever I go with el, he brings a smile to people's faces. But there was a decided hush and a generalized glare when we boarded. I was a little taken aback with this reaction. A couple of hours into the trip, however, as el was screaming from being overtired, I understood what the passengers' lack of delight at seeing a baby join the party was all about. El settled down to sleep within about five minutes. So hopefully we didn't put people out that much. I was quite proud of him. He slept most of the way and ate and played and was content to be on mom's lap. We fly to Mexico in September; so I thought it would be a good idea to get our feet wet with a little bus ride together.

As always, it was a delight to visit grandma. We look forward to a time when we will be only a holler away.

We had the pleasure of having grandma visit for a week. She just left last Sunday. And she was able to see el nino growing stronger and more mobile with each passing day. He inches himself forward, stretching with all his might to reach something just beyond his grasp, and he rolls and rolls and rolls. Our daug is a big motivation to move as well. He laughs whenever he catches sight of her and reaches out to touch her fur. As our living space is small and our desire for BIG toys minimal, we're grateful to have our daug to stimulate el.

We're also fortunate to live in an area (and now that it's spring!) with lots of stimulation outside. El loves to see dad or mom strap on the bjorn because that means he's going O-U-T! Once we put him in the carrier, he kicks his legs with delight, eager to get going.

Grandma and mom watched a special about Walter Cronkite last week. A reporter asked him who was the most interesting person he ever met, this man who has interviewed presidents. Mr. Cronkite responded without hesitation, "My wife." Lovely. So I began to think, who is the most interesting person I have ever met? "My son," I think to myself. He is such a wonder and a delight. And I so enjoy watching him learn and grow. It really is a miracle, life, isn't it?

This was my first Mother's Day. (My daug and I thought other years counted but that seems to be just between us.) I was fortunate to have my own mother with me on this, my first, Mother's Day. El nino, our daug, and Dad gave me flowers, a card, and lovely photos of el that I've only seen on the computer. Now I have prints to put in a photo album! We took a little family trip to the Noguchi Museum http://www.noguchi.org/, a lovely small sculpture museum the artist designed himself with a beautiful Japanese garden. Then we came home and Dad made Mom and Grandma an elegant dinner. It was a lovely, lovely Mother's Day.

El is sitting up on his own (though it is for less than a minute at a time). But he's getting better at it every day. Daddy put together his high chair (a gift from my sangha) and he loves it! El will be able to sit in his high chair and watch mommy cook. Wow, I can make something that takes more than a couple of minutes to reheat in the microwave! Being able to cook is one of the things I took for granted before el was born and has been particularly challenging now that I have a baby. El's dad and I have a finite amount of time together during the week. So I don't want to spend my Sundays with him cooking for the week to come. So I usually eat salads or reheat leftovers from the day before or buy a slice of pizza, super quick dinners is about all I can do.

I did recently, however, start to make quiche while el napped. He woke up in the middle of the process, and I put him in the bjorn while I finished cooking. (I can put him on a play mat, but he's not quite ready for that when he wakes up from a nap). While I was rolling out the dough for the quiche shell, el got his hands in the flour. I didn't feel very graceful trying to complete the process with el between me and the counter. His daddy manages somehow but then again, he's a chef. He will always have a grace in the kitchen that I cannot match.

So now we venture into a new phase of life in the kitchen with el. The high chair will bring some new wonders to explore. Happy cooking.

We thought el nino had a little case of pink eye (according to the pediatrician on call over the weekend). Mom detected a problem late Saturday and immediately called the pediatrician. I wasn't too upset at that point, just wanted to alert the doctor and find out if I needed to do anything. A couple of hours later his eye looked much worse and mommy started to panic. What is this extreme worry that comes over me now? I don't worry about my own health concerns like this. I don't jump to the absolute worst case scenario when it comes to me or el's dad or our daug. But when it comes to el, I lose all perspective. And I know I'm being extreme at the time, but I have difficulty bringing myself back down to normalcy. It didn't help that daddy was at work; so I had no one to share my fears with. Ughhh.

I was putting on my coat to take el to the emergency room when I spoke to el's dad on the phone. He calmed me down and suggested I wait until morning, put some eye drops in his eye... So we went to the pharmacy instead of the emergency room, and I found some very mild eye drops that said nothing on the packaging about not giving it to babies. I put one drop in his eye, and we got ready for bed. Now, mind you, el is perfectly content this whole time. He is smiling and laughing even. There was a little period of time when he was upset, but now I think that had more to do with being tired than with his eye. He was not rubbing his eye or otherwise indicating irritation in that area.

The next morning, Sunday, his eye was even more swollen. Again, panic, should we take him to the emergency room? Now, the pediatrician had told me the day before that we could see her in the afternoon on Sunday if it was not better. So, why I would feel the need to go to the stressful emergency room, who knows? Again, daddy was the voice of reason, but this time he suggested putting Visine in el's eye. Do NOT do this. We found out later that we should not have done that. Mommy didn't look at the bottle, assumed daddy had read the label and knew what he was doing. Well, daddy did read the label but ignored the part where it clearly states not to give it to children under 2. Thankfully we didn't do any harm as it turned out but it wasn't something we should have done at all the pediatrician said. She looked at el in the afternoon and couldn't see any foreign object in his eye so decided to treat him for pink eye. Mind you, the swelling had gone down significantly by now though he was still red in and around his eye. So we don't really know for sure that he has pink eye but that is what we are treating him for. And he is doing fine.

Today, Monday, he awoke with no swelling or redness around the eye but still red in the eye. And he is cheery, talkative, and sweet. And mommy can only hope that next time she will maintain a bit more perspective. (the update - el saw his regular pediatrician on Tuesday and no pink eye. She thought he must have poked himself in the eye instead. That's my boy!)

I think I've mentioned in a previous post that time is on my mind lately. I don't understand it much. Sometimes I feel as though I could touch a moment in time from my past, but when I count the years that separate that moment from my present I am surprised by how long ago it actually took place. And as I watch my young son grow, I sometimes feel as though I could touch a moment of time in his future when he is 5 or 10 or 20. And I know that I will look back at these moments 20 years from now and be surprised by how quickly the time flew. And whenever I say, "I can't wait..." I startle myself into realizing whatever it is I can't wait for will come and go so quickly that I'll have forgotten I was ever impatient for it. So I will endeavor to eradicate that phrase from my conversation.

So in an effort to appreciate time or not waste time or to enjoy time or whatever it is, I am tasting each moment as fully as I can. I was a little miffed with my husband this morning because he neglected to bring el's formula home after work last night. So I had to go get it myself before I fed him and went to work. As I walked my dog, I felt the tension in my body. And then it struck me that I could actually enjoy this errand. It's a beautiful day, I was with my lovely daug in the city I love. So the tension just melted away.

As I fed el nino, I drank in the smell of him, the texture of his hair, the softness of his skin. I held him against my shoulder, patting his back, as he cooed and wiggled.

Recently I said to my husband, "I can't wait to get my haircut." As I walked to work from the subway I felt the breeze sift through my hair and it felt lovely. No haircut yet, but I'll try to enjoy the sensation until it changes into something else.